Baby Blues…
Harper was just a few days old. My husband entered the room and I was sobbing. I tried to talk through my weeping, “I’m so happy. I just can’t stop crying. Don’t worry. I’m really happy.” My tear ducts had been highjacked. He looked worried; I looked pitiful. He wasn’t buying it. I have baby blues”, I whimpered. I grabbed my phone to show him a screenshot from my Google findings. He’d believe Google. Come to find out, baby blues are an expected part of becoming a new mom. A cacophony of hormonal changes converge with the exhaustion of delivery, and novelty of having a tiny creature to care for—resulting in baby blues.
A few days after giving birth, the new mom commonly experiences fluctuations in mood and untamable crying spells. Why had I never heard of this? It baffles me that I attended nine months of doctor’s appointments and spent days in the hospital—surrounded by well informed nurses and doctors, and no one thought to give me a heads up.There I was, initially, drenched in tears and needlessly confused as to why. The baby blues came suddenly, and thankfully, left quickly. Within ten days, the blue drifted away. I, was of course, still navigating motherhood for the first time, so I continued to ride the full spectrum of human emotions, but at least the water-works passed.
Maybe the speed in which the blues came and went factored into why my doctors and nurses didn’t bother to warn me about such occurrences. Perhaps to people in the know, baby blues are viewed as a short-term, standard, inconvenience—to them, maybe they have bigger fish to fry. Personally, I wish women in the know, would compile a list of “normal” experiences, so new moms can mitigate being blindsided and feeling strange when such events arise. My list would read as such:
During your second trimester, one’s sex drive may reach new heights. Her partner will likely say things like, “honey, what’s gotten in to you?”. This is normal.
When the baby’s umbilical cord falls off, a new mom may undergo big feelings over such a small thing. She may think things like, “Oh, no, my little girl is growing up so fast. Sooner than later, she’ll be heading off to college.” This is both absurd, and normal.
When a new mom goes to trim her baby’s fingernails, she may fear her daughter will twitch, or she worse yet, she will flench, resulting in harm. Said new mom, may chicken out, and wait another day to attempt timing her newborns tiny nails. This is normal.
Four to ten days postpartum, a new mom may experience inconsolable crying spells. She will try her best, through the tears, to convince her partner she is happy. This is normal.
This list is off-the-cuff. Veteran mothers and medical professionals, please feel free to contribute to this list; PSAs for new moms should be readily available.